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loneliness
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May 7, 2007 8:05 pm
Mood: lonely,
1550 Views
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I have been super busy recently. I dont know why; but i felt really lonely. I cannot find where my heart belongs to. It is totally lost. I hang out with friends; go to work and school but i still feel the loneliness is killing me. I dont know what is happening in my life.
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3
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hm,guys
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May 2, 2007 1:00 am
Mood: calm,
2239 Views
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I am not saying all guys are bad; but most of them are at lest stupid.
They get waht they want thn just kick you out of the game. I told this to someboday and he said' you must have experienced this." I was like" lol, watch out man." never thought you have to actually experience this to know. I sometimes feel it is true that guys just wanna get what they want; once they get it, game is over.
a lot of people asked me if i believe 'love at first sight". well, i dont believe that but i believe, guys nwould want to sleep with a hot chick if he saw her.
yiu may disagree; but i got my point too.
besides, that is just a general statement.
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2
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Thanks
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Apr 24, 2007 12:00 am
Mood: cheerful,
1177 Views
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The sun comes out today.
I should be thankful for what God has given to me. However I did quite the opposite.
Jesus died on the cross for us; yet his first word was "Father ,forgive them as they didn't know what they did."
God so loved the world and he gave his only son to them. Why should I be so sad and depressed? Shouldn't I just cheer up and celebrate since he has raised again!
Thanks!
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0
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You really don't have to be in this way!
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Apr 22, 2007 4:24 am
Mood: guilty,
1347 Views
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I called one friend to ask her if she wants to get together after exams. She didn't pick up the phone and then replied to me in text message, saying that she gets stressed out around me; she asked me not to call her anymore and gave her some space and time.
I respect you. I am sorry but you really don't have to put it in this way.
I got to know that I need help long time ago but I am not psyco; if anyone who doesn't need me could just leave.
Why does everyone hates me? What am I gonna do then? What do you wnat me to do? I really tried.
You know you really dont have to be that mean. but thanks to be honest with me.
So if I die, will everything be solved? Everybody will be happy then?
I am not prefect. I got my ups and downs; why do I always have to hide? what did I do so wrong?
I am really really tired.
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2
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That is crazy!
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Apr 21, 2007 8:03 pm
Mood: angry,
1257 Views
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I was really shocked when hearing the news of VA Tech. It is even more scary to hear someone actually describe the whole story to you. My uncle happened to teach at that school. I was talking to him on the phone the other day. The building he teaches in is not really far from where the accident happened. I thought it is crazy. Somehow it just won't get out off my mind for couple days.
Later last week, one of my guy friend told me he liked me a lot; but I replied that he is really not my type. He just won't listen or he just couldn't get what I really meant. He kept calling me; and he really freaked me out. Friday he called at 3 am and told me that if I couldnt make it to be his girlfriend he would commit suicide. We talked on the phone for 2 hours; the topic just wouldn't change. so i hanged off the phone, I was like" you know what if you really wanna die go for it."
I really don't want to be mean and rude; but if he has pushed me into that spot where I cannot manage my anger any more.
Then he was silent for couple days; I thought he is cool now. However; he called again yesterday. I didnt picked it up. He kept calling and calling; geez, 15 times. Then he sent me a text message ,saying" I wish I had a gun then I will shoot you and kill myself so we could be together!" I read the message and felt I was really on fire. The first time I felt how much I hate people in particular.
I was really mad the whole day and yelled at people; I know that was wrong but I just cannot cool it. Good thing we are not in the same city; otherwise it would be scary.
There are always psycos out there. I just get pissed off when people acting like that. Sometimes I just get really angry.
That is really crazy!
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2
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LEAVE ME ALONE!!
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Apr 20, 2007 5:57 pm
Mood: angry,
1361 Views
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If I told you once; now I am telling you twice. When I said I need a break, I need some space; I meant it; leave me alone. Stop calling me, test messaging me. Don't be a kid; how old are you? 10?
Listen up, I don't want to be rude and yell you to shut up; but if I have to, I will be. I am very impatient. So just f--- off and leave me alone. Who do you think you are!
Fod God sake, let me go and live your life. I don't need you co compete myself no matter what. Do not put yourself as Mr someone. You are nothing to me.
Leave me alone; and back off.
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4
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Sunny Day
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Apr 15, 2007 1:45 pm
Mood: cheerful,
1136 Views
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I figured that I worry too much in my real life. I worry about my exams, documents, work and etc. I talked to mum, she asked " where is your faith in God then?" Well, I looked back in the Bible " if you believe you wilk receive whatever you ask for in prayer." Mat 21:22. That is so true.
I prayed but took it back to me; thst is not gonna work. There is always ups and downs in life. God made it this way. If it is cloudy today , it will be sunny outside. Accept and enjoy what I have now is really important.
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0
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So don't push me!
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Apr 14, 2007 4:38 pm
Mood: angry,
1338 Views
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I hated the idea of being called cutie or beautiful sometimes. I just get trobles from guys all the time. And I had to deal with that. Gess, give me a break, I have enough to worry already in my life, I don;t have that extra time for guys.
Someone called me, saying that if I don't pick the right choice; he will kill himself; What the h--- that suppose to be. I am a individual myself; I am an adult; I got right to choose. I talked to him for almost 2 hours, nothing changes. so I set it like this If you really want to, go ahead, cannot control over you.
Look, I am tired of dealing with those dudes. People, think before you act. Who the h--- you think you are! Don't threathen me, what that suppose to be.ha?
So don't push me. If you do, I will run away. Be cool; and be a man. Show me some respect!
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2
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Released, phew!
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Apr 12, 2007 6:02 pm
Mood: earthy,
1335 Views
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Mihee called my the other day; she scared me. She told me somthing really wrong with her stomach too; I was like what, don't tell me it is cancer, She was crying and crying. But then I asked her if she felt anything ubnormal, she said not really. Well, there she goes, another checkup result came out. Nothing that serious. I called her; she was laughing how silly she thought she was. Yea, I told her, you wasted tears gal.
I thought what if... I wasn't brave enough to tell her what is going on with me and in my life. I know she cannot handle it. But it is all good, at least she is fine.
What a thing, I feel more released, phew...
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1
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Addicted
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Apr 9, 2007 11:31 am
Mood: disappointed,
1220 Views
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It is like a drug;
like the demons that I cannot face down;
And I know I let you have all the powers;
It is like you left;
sucked the life you left me alone;
And I know I will never to able to quit;
Without you in and out to me;
In my dreams;
It is like a lost;
Like I am giving up;
And I know I will never change the ways;
Like I canot feel that my heart;
I am addicted to it;
without you;
in my eyes, in my dreams;
like a nightmare;
I am handling it, quiting it, facing it;
just one more time;
Like I cannot breathe,
like I cannot feel anything;
I am addicted to you;
In my dreams;
in my mind;
You are taking off me;
I don't know me
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0
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