hmm...craving... Oct 26, 2007 10:28 am 1258 Views what do you crave? been discussing these things alot with various ppl... seems that alot of ppl think alot and crave the same things. because we are humans by nature. what are you craving right now???? 2 Comments

astonished Oct 25, 2007 9:48 pm Mood: annoyed, 1401 Views there is a recent kff'r male i talked to on the phone and he said that he's divorced after being married one year. he's only looking for friendship and if it leads to marriage, then great. he said that he wanted to be honest with me in case i was strictly looking for someone for marriage. (didn't have a word in edge-wise)... i told him with all the recent losers i've met and in the past on KFF, i was taking a break and just concentrating on school. then he tells me that i shouldn't look for someone single (as in never been married) at my age because it's not possible to find un-married ppl our age. and to not expect anyone to take care of me or look for a rich guy...b/c those guys want someone young. and he added...he doesn't think i'm like someone who would look for someone rich anyways...at my age. WTF???????????? he was born 1972. i am one year younger than him...hmmmm...i was a little offended...i know alot of ppl who are single that are in their 30s. alot of ppl who are ambitious and career-driven, some that are not. i don't know. he lied to me when he said he was single...yeah, he's single but he was once married, a divorcee??? he claimed to be single. to me, single means, NEVER BEEN MARRIED. i don't think i will talk to this Weirdo again, tells me that he lives in nor-cal and visits down here in LA (rowland heights) once a month. he works for the gov't and works odd hours, nights, evenings, and even weekends...he even implied that he wasn't rich. (i bet he doesn't work for the FBI, CIA or the secret service). i'm looking for someone who can challenge me in every way: 1. yes...i want someone ambitious 2. yes...i want a family man 3. yes...i want someone who works hard for his money so we don't have to live paycheck to paycheck (of course i'll be working too) 4. yes...i want someone who can make me laugh, cry, and pleasure me all at the same time 5. yes...etc. etc. i want all these things and more... WHY NOT? i have So much to Offer to my significant other. why should i settle for anything less than the best for me? i say...bypass me and talk to someone who cares... i wanted to take a break from the dating scene...he sure seals the deal on that DeciSion!! 4 Comments

new friend Oct 25, 2007 5:16 pm 1739 Views i am searching a new male friend to hang out with. any volunteers????? 11 Comments

still procrastinating Oct 24, 2007 11:43 pm 1255 Views i got the accounting projects done, but my prof doesn't make marketing fun... still have to read 4 chapters for the midterm and it's a quarter 'til midnight. hmmmm...why am i not motivated for this class? 2 Comments

dates are wrong in my head Oct 24, 2007 5:28 pm 1199 Views i kept on thinking that today was the 26th for some reason! ahhhhhhhh!!!!!! i'm procrastinating...i have 2 accounting assignments and a midterm tomorrow. and i'm not prepared. i just want to sleep. i don't know what to do... i just want to sleep! 1 comment

strange things Oct 20, 2007 1:05 am 1502 Views it's weird...things happen in 3's. went out to dinner with one of my friends friday night. all of us are under stress. she was sharing with me that she was struggling. the friend i fought with is under stress. i'm under stress. so we went to the grove to do some retail therapy. we bought things (and most of you know that i hate shopping) and it helped us feel better. got cute tank tops, a cute pair of dress up shorts, and some work-out jackets. i hated the whole shopping aspect of it, but it was great to walk around the grove and see that a particular sweatshirt i wanted from abercrombie was WAY TOOOOOOOOOOOO EXPENSIVE. i love their t-shirts and their sayings...i wanted to buy "TOO HOT TO CARE"...maybe if i lost an add'l 30 pounds, i would be able to pull that off. just wanted to share with everyone how i spent my friday night. 4 Comments

friendship Oct 19, 2007 4:32 pm 1416 Views thank you all for trying to cheer me up the last couple of days. i love this new concept i have now. guys will be my friends...nothing more. then over time, if something develops into something, then i welcome it. but i want to keep everything casual with dating now. not going to invest my heart and energy on just one guy... 4 Comments

tired and sad Oct 18, 2007 12:10 am Mood: lonely, 1820 Views it's kind of sad...i've been going through some hard times and none of my friends were there for me last night. although everything came back as fine, i would think they would call and see if i was really relieved or still anxious about things. and then the friend whom i fought with, she didn't even care to send me an e-mail. that shows that i wasn't really her true friend. even in the mist of being pissed off at me, i would still think she would be curious about my well-being. then to top it off...my mom had a crappy day yesterday at work, it was her birthday. an annoying, rude, and pitbullish co-worker just made my mom's life hell at work. and then i had to drop everything and make sure that dinner was available...order pizza and i made soup. we celebrated her birthday on sunday but i still felt that we should spend time together. i was frustrated that someone was giving my mom such a hard time. wanted to go kick some assssssssssssssssssssssssssss...that nurse named choi. then, my parents and i decided that it is time to put our 14 year old dog Rocksy to sleep at the end of the month. she is suffering from a tumor and she was too old to have an operation. she isn't in any discomfort and our vet 3 months ago said she'll be fine, but too old and dangerous to operate on. i felt really alone yesterday. 1) i should have felt victorious after my results came back, NOT, still hurt from that bast--d. i can't seem to shake this one. 2) nurse choi, that pitbullish, ugly woman gave my mom such a hard time for a week, especially on my mom's birthday. 3) needing to savor every moment i have with my dog rocksy. and say goodbye to her. even as i write this, i still feel alone. i'm just so exhausted from work, school, and my personal struggles. i know that i have to be a better person and learn from my mistakes ... but i am still hurt. still left in shambles. can't really help my mom but listen and be a good daughter to her...make good grades, and show her that i can do ALL THINGS!!! and say goodbye to my dog, my companion, i've had for 10 years. but yet with all the assignments, training the new girl at work, homework, readings, i can't seem to be busy enough to not think about things. after that NY trip, i've been really shaken up. i can't shake it. at times i feel like i'm strong. but i just want to hide in a hole and not come out. i don't know what to do... 9 Comments

casual partners Oct 16, 2007 9:29 am 1510 Views life was so much simplier when i was just casually dating. it's good to have male friends...they bail you out of situations...flat tire, starvation, movie date on a friday night, night of drunkenness...etc. etc. with the demands of school and work and my girlfriends...i can't even seem to hold down the second date with a guy... i'm just not interested anymore. no one really "WOWS" me...bored with all of them. same conversations, the same questions and answers. i rather hang out with the girls, at least with that there are guaranteed laughter and good times. it's nerve-racking with a guy. you need to get dressed up, need to put on makeup, act all prim and proper. don't get me wrong, i like getting all dressed up and painting the town red...but it seems that i don't want to do that with just anyone. hmmm...casual dating...i like the sound of it. no attachment, no obligations, pay dutch then you don't have to worry about kissing them goodnight (not that i kiss on the first date anyways), just be pals. have fun like i used to when i first went to college... 4 Comments

it's interesting... Oct 15, 2007 10:15 pm 1396 Views friendship comes in all shapes and sizes... i like this new turn of events...these new friendships i've developed. it's great!! 2 Comments

 DangerousBeauty2