soul connection... Mar 18, 2008 12:45 am 2159 Views everyone is seeking it. everyone craves it. mind blowing sex...does that happen bc you can't have an intellectual relationship? great sex is great especially with someone you can have that soul connection. i got these thoughts from "sex in the city." i've always wondered...do you have to do without to have the other? or can you find and have both? i know reality and fantasy is entirely different. but i can't help to wonder if our minds play games within itself to mess up the thought processes. fantasy can be reality... i want both... but... is it possible to have both? mind blowing sex and intellectual conversation? what do you think? 38 Comments

gossip and rumors Mar 17, 2008 12:14 pm 1385 Views wow...people just love to be in everyone's business. i think one should just focus on improving themselves instead of overexaggerating on the things that were said and misconstrue what wasn't said. they are so miserable in their own life that they have to report to others on things being said and assume things. yes...karma will come back at you and bite you in the asssss. stop spreading the rumors and telling other people (especially to men) your business and how you were wronged. so immature and so low class (in fact---trash like behavior). people need to just let things go and learn to live their lives as best as they can. but if you are miserable and lonely, you'll attract those that are just as miserable and lonely...and weird. i've been so much happier dumping someone whom has caused so much drama and has dragged others into her business. i know there was something wrong with this person in every way from the first event i was invited to. so it is my fault for giving her the benefit of the doubt. that is how i am...i always give people chances to improve themselves. this one...is a lost cause--even those who are close to her "supposedly." ok...enough biatching... most of you know me...i won't back down on a fight or argument when i know that person is absolutely demented, delusional, and wrong. i feel sad for her now...bc she has no idea that she has made her life the way it is bc of her actions and words. it's sad really. so hopeless. a lost cause. once again...i get the last laugh. puhahahhah. 7 Comments

HOTNESS part II Mar 10, 2008 9:03 pm 1713 Views the other night when i went out to dinner with a new friend. i was waiting in the hotel lobby in j-town. i was walking by this old man and he was like "NICEEEE..." mind you i don't go to hotel lobbies and wait for someone...please don't get the wrong idea. but it was a really nice bar and restaurant. we had a 8 course meal at the restaurant and it was really fancy. didn't know if i should be offended or pleased. the older man wasn't all that bad looking but almost as old as my dad. an older gentleman...i know some girls are into that...but i'm not. but nice to receive complements again. although the idea is still new after so long of letting myself go...it was nice. my new friend (he wasn't the old man) was also pleased of how i looked. i dressed very conservatively but tried some new things with the makeup and hair style...i guess it paid off. hee hee. as i stated in an earlier blog on "hotness"...life is too short to limit myself to one idea, one concept, one being, etc. i've entered a different level of "hotness" now...in my 30's...i feel like i am slowly regressing back to my days when i was in my early 20's. it was alot of fun. with lost pounds...i am now ready for another level of fun...with this newfound hotness. met alot of people, traveled alot, experienced new things in life in my 20's. now in my 30's...with a new career path in front of me...i can't wait to see what else is in store for me. sky's the limit... 15 Comments

in my own skin... Mar 9, 2008 9:37 pm 1374 Views i am a woman who is comfortable in my own skin now. i've gone through so much in the past that it was discouraging but now i'm finally almost at the goal i wanted. i've let myself go... i am finally comfortable in my own skin, i still have a ways to go (another 10 or so) but...i am finally at a place where i can be totally comfortable being in my own skin. not afraid to stand in the mirror anymore. i can't wait to get there... my self-confidence was just dormant, hibernating if you will...now i feel like nothing can get me down. it helps that i have admirers... hee hee. 5 Comments

In Search of My Candy Man... Mar 5, 2008 9:29 pm 1485 Views "Candyman" by Christina Aguilera Candy man, candy man... Sweet sugar candy man [whispered] I met him out for dinner on a Friday night He really had me working up an appetite He had tattoos up and down his arm There's nothing more dangerous than a boy with charm He's a one stop shop, makes my panties drop He's a sweet-talkin', sugar coated candy man A sweet-talkin', sugar coated candyman Ooo yeah.. He took me to the Spider Club at Hollywood and Vine We drank champagne and we danced all night We shook the paparazzi for a big surprise the gossip tonight will be tomorrow's headline He's a one stop shop, make my cherry pop He's a sweet-talkin', sugar coated candy man A sweet-talkin', sugar coated candyman Se bop bop Hey yeah ... He's a one stop shop, makes my cherry pop He's a sweet-talkin', sugar coated candy man oh A sweet-talkin', sugar coated candyman Woo yeah Well by now i'm getting all bothered and hot When he kissed my mouth he really hit the spot He had lips like sugar cane Good things come to boys who wait Candy man can... Candy man Candy man Tarzan and Jane were swingin' on a vine Sipping from a bottle of vodka double wine Candy man, candy man Sweet sugar candy man [whispered] He's a one stop, gotcha hot, making all the panties drop Sweet sugar candy man [whispered] He's a one stop, got me hot, making my uh pop Sweet sugar candy man [whispered] He's a one stop, get it while it's hot, baby don't stop Sweet sugar candy man [whispered] He got those lips like sugar cane Good things come for boys who wait He's a one stop shop with a real big egh He's a sweet-talkin', sugar coated candyman [x3] Candyman, candyman 6 Comments

10 Things I Absolutely Love About You... Mar 4, 2008 6:43 am 1561 Views 1. your endless support when i need a friend 2. your never-ending smile 3. your dedication to your family and friends 4. your will to forever keep your spunk 5. your subtle ways of touching me 6. your encouragement when i feel down 7. your drive to succeed 8. your will to live 9. your energy to work-out 10. your glances and complements to me ==this addresses a couple of people and some individuals. 1. thank you for your support and friendship. 2. thank you for the smile you put on my face. 3. thank you for being the woman that you are. 4. thank you for being the man that you are. 5. thank you for steering me in the right direction. 6. thank you for thinking that i am beautiful. 7. thank you for encouraging me to be the best. 8. thank you for the kick in the rear when i needed it. 9. thank you for being honest with your feelings and opinions. 10. thank you for being you...and being a part of my life. 6 Comments

10 Things I Absolutely Dislike About You... Mar 2, 2008 10:47 am Mood: satisfied, 1670 Views 1. blame others for your drunken stupidity 2. blame your lack of commitment because you don't have your shiet together 3. blame me for the girl dumping you because she put many items together that night 4. blame the world because your people have been abused and violated (look in all history, every nation has been abused and violated) 5. blame yourself for being fat when you can do something about it 6. blame me for your small ego because you can't handle a joke 7. blame other girls because you can't find a boyfriend 8. blame other guys for their better game plan 9. blame the world for your lack of diligence to get right within yourself 10. blame myself for my stupidity last week (this is towards me) because you thought life was that terrible that you wanted to end your life --this addresses a combination of people and addresses specific people, and come on...i put myself on the list too so don't be so damn critical. life is what you make of it. i learned it the hard way last week when i thought that my world was falling apart. i drove some people to become distant from me. others i've drawn closer. you can't rely on others to change yourself. only you can change yourself. only you can make specific changes to your life. you have no right to complain about anything until you have done everything possible to succeed and you fail time and time again. until you have bled your last drop...you cannot say you've really tried. i am thankful for the two women who have come into my life and helped me think more rational. my rational mind was there...it just needed guidance and venting. a stir in the right direction. even through all of this, a new friend has become closer to me too. you can never really tell from the people you meet if they are who they truly are. but it's through these hard times that you know who's light you want to shine right along side with. never settle for second best. never settle for low class. never settle for foolish behavior. never ask for free shiet, work for your damn food!!! thank you for the people on that list...it's helped me realize that i'm better off. i have a better life compared to those on the list. it's those delusions of self hate and hate for others that makes you who you are. it's a wonder how...these individual people blame me for their misfortune...it makes me build up my ego though...that i had that much of an impact in their lives that actual name calling and blame have been directed at me. i have the last laugh... 9 Comments

my baby... Mar 2, 2008 12:24 am 1429 Views i'm such the proud mama. i don't even like leaving her for a second... here is the latest pic of her...an hour after her bath... her and her toothbrush...to help with her teething. ee-poon-ee is definitely my first child. 4 Comments

"stay..." Feb 29, 2008 1:03 pm 1199 Views One of my all time favorite country songs... Whether it is someone else, your career, your past, your fears, the distance, etc... Its sad you can't give yourself to me...and I am now hesitant to give my heart... I guess only time will let us know if it is meant to be... but now...even though i want to hold on to what could have been. i know that i need to move on. This song always touches my heart. It makes me cry each time... Stay (Jennifer Nettles) I been sittin' here starin' At the clock on the wall And I been layin' here prayin' Prayin' she won't call It's just another call from home And you'll get it and be gone And I'll be cryin' And I'll be beggin' you, baby Beg you not to leave But I'll be left here waitin' With my heart on my sleeve Oh, for the next time we'll be here Seems like a million years And I think I'm dyin' What do I have to do to make you see She can't love you like me Why don't you stay I'm down on my knees I'm so tired of bein' lonely Don't I give you what you need When she calls you to go There is one thing you should know We don't have to live this way Baby, why don't you stay (yeah) You keep tellin' me, baby There will come a time When you will leave her arms And forever be in mine But I don't think that's the truth And I don't like bein' used And I'm tired 'a waitin' It's too much pain to have to bear To love a man you have to share Why don't you stay I'm down on my knees I'm so tired of bein' lonely Don't I give you what you need When she calls you to go There is one thing you should know We don't have to live this way Baby, why don't you stay (yeah) I can't take it any longer But my will is gettin' stronger And I think I know just what I have to do I can't waste another minute After all that I put in it I've given you my best Why does she get the best of you So next time you'll find You wanna leave her bed for mine Why don't you stay I'm up off my knees I'm so tired of bein' lonely You can't give me what I need When she begs you not to go There is one thing you should know I don't have to live this way Baby, why don't you stay, yeah Oh 2 Comments

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