Already... but not yet...  

paestreet 9/21/2009 2:23 pm Last Read: 9/24/2009 9:46 am	It`s been a while, I haven`t posted here (on KFF) anything... Things, job, education and so on... What`s new? Almost nothing... The same routine. 6 a.m. bell rings, at 7 already at work, at 2 p.m. on another work(still studying). Do not visit University at all. In october will go to the sea. Will be arriving there for about one month, maybe more. Actually, I`m lost. Lost somewhere inside of me. Don`t know what I really want from this life. For the last time I understood, that realtionship between me and dad, are stretched! He still wants me to study how to live, and some time after told me, that I must make decisions by myself... How can I do it, when I`m under control??? Everytime, when I get some news at work, when we meet with dad, he asks my about a thing... That`s easy to understand, cause everywhere that I go, he has neighbours and friends. Fu*k!!! He even knows, how much money did I earn thia or that month! Some pretty sh*tty stressful situation... I thought hundred times about living the country, and build my own life. When I hear from dad: "You're already grownup, I wanna see you makin' moves by your own!" And when I start to do something, he appears and as usual... Studying me how to live... Tired of that Sh******... Can't take it anymore... Wanna find myself... A week ago went to do some psychological tests.. Psychologist will call me back this week, to make conclusion about results... I'm not nerves. just wanna tell her something, that scratches my soul and my inside world. And it's a pity, that even psychologist isn't a human, I could talk to like a person that is similar to me for 20% ))) But anyway, life goes on! We have to thank God, that he gifted us another one day of life! We have to share each other! Must not forget to tell our relatives and nearest that we LOVE 'em, when leavin a house, or when just calling them. It will be better soon, I believe! Take care people! Don't let small things to put you down!
DarkWolf1974 23 posts  9/23/2009 2:03 am	You do sound a bit down and stretched there, and lacking a bit of drive and purpose. Myself and my brother have been where you are now, and the good intentions of well-meaning parents can sometimes prove to be overbearing and aggravating - just remember they are only doing that because they care Some day, when the fog of uncertainty clears and you can look back on this turbulent period in your life, I hope you'll realise this Good luck with the tests - chances are you'll need a bit of medication to give you a bit of a boost to tide you over in the meantime. However, your longer term prospects and contentment will be down to you, bro Take care and be cool
paestreet 35 posts  9/23/2009 12:06 pm	thx for support, DarkWolf! Hope soon it`ll be much better!